Friday, August 8, 2008

Bawls Guaranexx Sugar Free

I'm wanting to review something today not strong, but light since I'm feeling a bit tired and what not. I checked my energy drink fridge and decided the Bawls Guaranexx Sugar Free fulfilled my craving exactly. If I remember correctly, the regular Bawls was extremely light, I mean there was barely any flavor. So, following the rules of sugar free energy drinks, this one will be even lighter. Or it can have the alternative affect of being artificially sweeter hence more of a lame flavor. I'm going to assume it has the second affect of being pretty lame because of the amount of artificial sugar in it, most likely Sucralose. In fact, I'm going to check right now and tell you it's sweetened with Sucralose and Acesulfame Potassium; okay I just hope it's masked well. The 10 ounce glass bottle has a great, simple bottle design being just words like "Bawls", "Guaranexx", "Sugar Free" in a blue font. It has tiny bawls pounded out of the bottle for traction, perhaps. Nobody wants to drop an energy drink, do they? I'm guessing a flavor that's almost pure artificial sweetener, with maybe just a bit of 7up/Pixie Sticks/Lemon Drops flavor. Well, I may think it's not going to be that great, but I'm going to find out anyway.

I hurt my fingers twisting off the cap, but I got to it and found it hard to target a scent inside the bottle. It smells more like Splenda and lemon, with some sharp alcohol aroma, reminding me of nothing really. The color, I forgot to mention, is clear, just like water, no bubbles or a foamy head. Now, the flavor has to be so unappetizing I don't feel like drinking one more sip. If you could pour Splenda inside carbonated water, and add just small, and I mean small dash of lemon-lime, you got this horrid taste. I'd have to admit, this is one of the only drinks I'm putting on the Worst Taste List, only because this is the most artificial energy drink I've ever tried or reviewed. It tastes almost like the Rockstar Sugar Free, but less tropical flavor and more artificial flavor. Almost finished with the can, I experience major stomach pain, due to the extremity of the Sucralose and Acesulfame K. It's not too carbonated, at least not so much as to bug you while you drink it, although I hope you don't purchase one. The aftertaste is where it gets even worse; it's a powerful artificial lemon-lime taste in the back of your tongue. It really is bad. Bawls Sugar Free isn't gummy at all, but there's many factors that make up for the gumminess, as you should know by now. Overall, Bawls Guaranexx Sugar Free was a complete failure. It's an addition to the Worst List, nor do I recommend it.

The ingredients are nothing special being water, citric acid, potassium benzoate, natural guarana extract, artificial flavor, caffeine, Sucralose, and Acesulfame Potassium. It also notes: "Warning: This product contains high levels of caffeine." Now, just a bit of research reveals that this drink only has 110mg of caffeine in the whole 10 ounce bottle. What? Yeah, that's right, only 110mg. Well, every company has their own way of falsely promoting their products. Per bottle, you don't get any calories, nor do you get any carbohydrates and sugar. They should mention it's artificially sweetened on the nutrition facts, I think. Actually, coming back to the review, I find myself pretty hyper due to the discovery of massive amounts of guarana in the drink complimenting the minimal caffeine. It's pretty surprising how the taste is horrid but the kick is pretty good. I only recommend you get this drink for the kick, just ignore the taste. All in all, my stomach is killing me, and it will yours too, but hey, I was curious and I needed to review it.

Taste: 2.7 - It's no better than putting Splenda in 10 ounces of carbonated water
Kick: 8.6 - The kick is pretty great; I liked the amount of guarana in it, as well as some caffeine
Overall: 5 - Don't get it, unless you want a better than average kick

Reviewed by: Chan

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Jeffery "Jeff," Chandler "Chan"