Sunday, May 16, 2010

Mountain Dew Distortion

The last and most anticipated Mountain Dew review for me will be the Distortion, the lime-blasted Dew. The fluorescent green is as enticing as the regular green, but it pairs nicely with the dark label. Just like the other flavors, Typhoon and White Out, Distortion is a candidate to become a permanent member of the soda brand's line. I checked out the Dewmocracy forums at to find a fierce debate about all three flavors. The discussion is never-ending and intense. The outcome of the voting will surely make a lot of people happy...and even more crestfallen that their flavor will likely never be seen again. With the final review, Chan and I will make our decision and cast our votes for which flavor we want to see prevail.

A whiff straight from the bottle rouses me with a foundation of the regular citrus formula, and on top of that is the sharply sour smell of pure lime. It really smells like someone just squeezed a lime into a Mountain Dew, and it's amazing. Poured into a cup of ice, the smooth, dark green transmutates to a bright key lime. Fizzy, Distortion could possibly be mistaken for the regular Mountain Dew, but as it mellows out, the lovely lime really stands out. It's also more noticeable over ice. To be honest, at first, the Distortion might seem a little disappointing, which is why I'm not drinking it all at once. Wait a little while, have it over ice, and that's when the delicious lime flavor truly shines. Some may argue Mountain Dew tastes too much like the regular Mountain Dew, and in truth, it is very close. But something about the shot of lime when it hits you is utterly delicious.Whether you favor it or not, this drink is one you've just got to try.

Now, considering Mountain Dew is a soda, it's not going to provide such a great boost as a full-on energy drink. Despite that, Mountain Dew does provide a nice buzz from the 91mg of caffeine per 20oz bottle and of course all that sugar. Per serving, there's 30 grams, 76 total. Like any soda, Mountain Dew's primary ingredients are carbonated water, HFCS, and flavorings. Interestingly enough, where the regular Mountain Dew lists orange juice concentrate, the Distortion does not. Also found in Mountain Dews is brominated vegetable oil. I can't say exactly what that is, and it doesn't sound like something that really belongs in a soda, but in fact, it plays an important role as an emulsifier in citrus drinks. Concerning the kick, just like any other Mountain Dew, Distortion will pick you up with its 91mg of caffeine per bottle, though I have to admit, the large amount of sugar drags me down sometimes.

So, now's the time I decide which flavor I'm for. It hasn't been easy deciding, but in the end, I'd want to see Distortion on store shelves more than any of the three. The originality and distinctiveness of the subtle, yet delicious, simple, yet sophisticated lime draws me to this one the most. Though I'm disappointed to see Distortion falling in the polls, and despite many assertions Distortion is not different enough to win, I still think this is the best flavor that could possibly join the Mountain Dew lineup.

And for those of you who say it shouldn't win because it's the same color: pour the regular Dew and the Distortion into a glass. Dew's yellow. Distortion's green.

Taste: 9 - A spectacular lime accenting the awesomeness that is Dew for a simple, yet sophisticated and altogether delicious beverage
Kick: 6.4 - Good game fuel, good to see from a soda
Overall: 8.8 - I'll be rooting for this one all the way

Reviewed by: Jeff

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Jeffery "Jeff," Chandler "Chan"